Y’all…I’m gonna take a break from my usual stuff (though I’m pretty sure no one reads my stuff anyway) and old school journal. This is, in part, how I will process. Nothing fancy, just me and my stream of consciousness.
Today is day 19 for us. Where we live schools closed on March 13 with the anticipated return date as April 14 (this would later change to school being closed for the rest of the year which is heartbreaking). So, since the following day was a Saturday, I didn’t count it as day 1. That Sunday, though, I did count as day 1 because we serve our church’s mobile campus and are usually involved with church stuff from 6am-2p. That day though, church service was exclusively online. Now, for my church it wasn’t that big of a stretch b/c we’ve done this before and live stream Sundays, anyway. The point is, it was the first day that our “normal” routine changed.
I’ll back it up two days from today. We went grocery shopping b/c mandatory Stay-at-Home order was put in place for Virginia til June 10. (Yup, you read that right, June 10 and today is April 2. God Bless!!!) Anyway, hubs and I came up with a protocol to minimize outside germs coming into the house. Y’all…it was stressful and traumatic! I ended up screaming at my teen and needing to put myself in timeout for a bit. I felt horrible about the way I yelled and later apologized but still. It was ugly. The trip to the grocery store made our current situation real for my teen, who, by the way, is a High School Senior this year and should by all accounts be prom dress shopping, and looking forward to graduation. It breaks my heart! I’ve shed tears for her so much.
Last night, my youngest got in trouble for breaking a rule we set in place for her. You see, we’re not a tech family but with the current situation tech is how we’re keeping in touch, kids included. So, with that in mind, we’re letting our youngest video chat and text with her buddies. Not being a tech family we’ve some rules she needs to follow. It’s new to her. I get it. I do. But, y’all…when she broke that one rule I totally lost my cool AGAIN!!! For the love!!! I hate what I sound like when I’m yelling. Hate it! My youngest who, by the way, is in her last year of elementary school and should by all accounts be looking forward to her last end-of-year picnic and 5th grade promotion. It breaks my heart for her too, and I’ve shed tears for her too.
Reacting to them like this is NOT my norm. (At least, I don’t think it is. I’m latina so I do get loud and animated which may come across as yelling, but trust me – there’s a difference.) I’m the mom who cries the first day of school b/c I love hanging out with them. What is going on with me? I blame the Rona.
Today is a new day. I pray we figure this out. The question is how. What are you doing to adjust to this Quarantine life?
That’s my story. What’s yours?
Own Your Story 